Reflection in the night after reading old texts from a person who I will never meet again.

I felt something for her that I won’t acknowledge that I really long for. I was also in a place where I had energy to spend. And that made it so much brighter. That flame, I’m afraid… No! It’s not gone.

It’s not drugs or alcohol that’s the things. It’s doing things by myself for myself. Enjoying myself. I’m going to do that more. Meet new people. Not get hung up on all responsibility and old acquaintances.

Why couldn’t it have ended in a better way? When will I learn?

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